In a funny performance at the this year's College Unions Poetry Slam Invitational, a dad from Utah runs down all the ways he's been preparing for the boy who might one day break his daughter's heart.
Some of the lines from his poem:
'To the boys who will one day date my daughter,' 'I have been waiting for you.
'Since before her birth. since before my spark took hold and ignited a fire in her mother's belly, I have been training to kill you.'
'Pay no attention to my ample crawlspace, my room with a rubber mat and a drain. Be careful to only approach me with love for my daughter. '
To the girls who may one day date my daughter: My wife is a better shot than I am.'